EP – 87 Stories With Grandpa

Our conversation with Josiah Fogle

Josiah Fogle has created children’s books to help his children experience the vital lessons that John Fogle instilled in him. Josiah admired his father and was influenced by him through spending years as a family in the Philippines as missionaries. Through writing about Grandpa John, Josiah has built a bridge between his father’s legacy and Josiah’s children, who are learning about their grandfather through actual family stories and memories and impactful children’s books.

We continue our discussion and dive into the world of writing and publishing for both children’s books and grown-up books. Josiah is a Sales Development Manager with the organization Self Publishing School. You will learn that one thing that sets Josiah apart from many other people working in the publishing game is that Josiah IS a published author.

In our conversation, Josiah educates us on the different types of publishing available today, from simple ebooks to traditional publishing. We discuss the pros and cons of each publishing method and how many successful authors started their journey by choosing the self-publishing route. Josiah also discusses the many services that Self Publishing School has to offer.

All this conversation about publishing and the different options available to authors today will hopefully motivate YOU to jump into the game to create the story that only YOU can tell.

Once you have finished listening to this episode, please remember to like and subscribe to the podcast. Josiah and I would also be excited if you were to share this conversation with a friend who would enjoy our chat and who would also get value in learning more about writing and publishing a book.

Remember to leave a short note in the comments section below about what part of this conversation inspired you. Josiah and I would love to hear from you and what your “Aha moment” was from our conversation.

Links

Click HERE to visit Josiah’s website, Stories With Grandpa. Be sure to check out the different books he has there. Maybe one of them would make an excellent present for your grandchild.

Click HERE to visit Josiah’s LinkedIn profile.

Click on this link to learn more about Peekabond.

Click on this link to learn and sign up for Readeo.

EP – 84 Priming the Pump

Our monthly one on one conversation

“Welcome back, my friends to the show that never ends. We’re so glad you could attend! Come inside! come inside!” – Emerson, Lake & Palmer.

I am happy to have a moment with you. I enjoy these one-on-one conversations, and I hope you find them valuable for your grandparenting journey.

This month, I want to discuss steps you can take to ‘prime the pump’ or, in other words, plan your next visit with your children and grandchildren. Some people will tell you that the only actual planning you should do on your stays (assuming you live out of town) is when you arrive and depart. They will say that should be enough planning and that the trip should be an organic experience.

I say that not having a plan is a recipe for miscommunication and missed opportunities for your adult children, grandchildren, and YOU.

I am not saying that you have to have every minute of your visit planned but what I am saying is that you need to have some plans for your trip, AND you need to build up some anticipation about your stay with the grandchildren.

Put yourself back into your early parenting days for a minute. How would you have liked to have your parents or in-laws show up at the house for a few days, a week, a month with no idea what they wanted to do or not do? Think about the level of stress that would manifest itself with so many unknowns. Do the grandparents want to have a big dinner at some point? Do they want to take the grandkids to the park or zoo? What days is all this going to happen? What about play dates? Times that I was going to work on the car? Painters coming to the house? There are a lot of unknown questions here AND a lot of potential stress.

Grandpa’s, we need to help make sure that our time with our children and grandchildren is as stress-free as possible so that EVERYONE can enjoy the time together.

Here are a few tips that I do and that I have found to help set expectations and reduce stress for those days when my wife and I visit our children and grandchildren.

Start communicating early and often about the expected arrival and departure dates until your travel dates are 100% locked in.

– If you are planning Grandpa/ grandchild activities that are more than an hour, start talking about the dates and times of those activities as early as possible. The parents and grandchildren have schedules that they will need to adjust for your fun activities.

– Ask the parents what activities they think the grandchildren would like. Children’s tastes, activity levels, and interests might have changed since your last visit.

– Use text messages or emails to write down the loose itinerary for everyone. Talking about the calendar AND seeing the calendar may trigger forgotten activities that the kids or grandkids had planned. “Measure twice cut once”

– Leave some blank or ‘zero days.’ Everyone needs some flexibility for last-minute plans and some “grandpa is pooped out” time. 🙂

– Start priming the pump with the grandkids early. This activity is age-dependent, but 30 days out is a good rule of thumb.

– Send video messages about the visit talking about the fun you will have with the grandchildren.

– Use snail mail to shoot a postcard talking about a fun activity. Maybe print out and send tickets to the Zoo, Waterpark, or something else that requires tickets or a pass with older kids.

Your list and planning activities may vary from mine, which is okay. The important thing is to recognize that some pre-planning and a lot of communication will reduce the natural stress that a visit from grandpa and grandma can produce. After all, we want every visit to be memorable for the good times and feelings and not hurt feelings or misunderstandings that can happen when we visit our children and grandchildren.

Be sure to like and subscribe to the podcast if you have not done so already. Also, please share this episode and podcast with a friend. Sharing is the best way to spread the information people need to grow and maintain relationships with their family and friends.

Click on this link to learn more about Peekabond.

Click on this link to learn and sign up for Readeo.

EP – 81 Grandpas as Coaches

A one-on-one with you

This episode is another one-on-one conversation with you and me. I open up the conversation with a quick trip report from my last trip to Virginia the week before Easter. I spent a lot of time with my grandson, who is almost four years old. I confess that spending multiple days with him wore me out physically and mentally.

It has been a long time since I chased toddlers around a playground and museum for hours at a time. I also forgot that three-and-a-half-year-olds don’t just play 20 questions; they play 120 questions and tend to compress those questions into a 25-minute car ride.

It was a great trip being around my grandson and granddaughters, but it was also nice to hand them off at the end of the day and have some time to recharge my batteries before the next round of adventures.

I also want to talk to you about grandfathers taking on the role of a coach in our relationship with our grandchildren. You might think of being a coach in other terms, such as teacher, mentor, guide, or another title. Use whatever title makes sense to you, but grandfathers ARE leaders AND motivators for our grandchildren and children.

We dive into what are some good characteristics of a good coach. Good coaches are made up of the following attributes:

Understands Life and Leads by Example

Sponge for Knowledge

Shares the Knowledge

Deeply knows the player (grandchild)

Energizes and Motivates Others

Good Listener

After listening to this episode, I hope that you think about the attributes of the good coaches and mentors you had in your life. Do you intentionally practice and take on the attribute of a coach when it comes to your relationship with your grandchildren?

Links

Click HERE to listen to my one-on-one show about being a cheerleader.

Peekabond

Readeo

EP – 80 The GaGa Sisterhood

Our conversation with Donne Davis

This week’s guest is Donne Davis. Donne started the GaGa Sisterhood group to bring inspiration, support, and tools to grandmothers worldwide. Donne became a grandmother in 2003, and for over nineteen years, she has been on a mission to connect with other grandmas and explore the evolving role of being a grandmother.

Donne and I start our conversation by discussing her experience in becoming a grandmother and its impact on her life. Donne explains that when the midwife held up her first granddaughter, Donne was GaGa for that grandchild and has been committed to her grandchildren ever since.

We also dive into how the role of being a grandmother and a grandfather has changed in a short time. Donne and I agree that loving and supporting our grandchildren starts with loving and supporting their parents. Both of us agree that the parents often get left out of the grandparent/ grandchild relationship equation.

Donne was motivated to write a book for grandmothers after realizing the relationship with the grandchild’s parents can present challenges in understanding each other’s perspectives. Her book is titled: “When Being a Grandma Isn’t So Grand: 4 Keys to L.O.V.E. your Grandchild’s Parents“.

Once you have listened to this conversation, please share it with a friend and especially a grandmother who would enjoy listening to this episode. Links to Donne’s website and different connections are listed below.

Be sure to leave Donne and me a comment below about what you enjoyed about this episode.

Links

Click HERE to be taken to Donne’s GaGa Sisterhood website. Donne sends out a monthly newsletter called the GaGazine, which you can subscribe to on her website’s homepage.

Click HERE to follow Donne on Instagram.

Click HERE to connect with Donne on Facebook.

Click HERE to connect with Donne on Twitter.

You can check out Donne on Pinterest by clicking HERE

Here is the link to my conversation with Kerry Byrne about her group, The Longdistance Grandparent, that Donne and I referenced.

Click HERE to learn more about the Moby Wrap

Peekabond

Readeo

EP – 76 Being a Cheerleader

Our One on One

This episode is a chance for you and me to catch up. It has been a month or so since we last spoke. In this conversation, I talk about the critical role of being a grandfather who is a cheerleader for their grandchild.

I review the different ages of development and the various ways that grandfathers can be intentional about encouraging and cheering on grandchildren. Grandchildren at different ages need different types of encouragement.

As former guest Richard Eyre says, “Kids thrive, flourish, and blossom in the light of the thoughtful, specific, sincere compliments, particularly from grandfathers!” I couldn’t agree more. Grandfathers add that extra spark to a grandchild’s life when given a compliment and encouragement to do well at tasks they attempt.

I believe, like so many of our guests and experts, that grandfathers can act a bit like a seawall where our actions and words can break up some of the negativity that comes at our grandchildren. How a grandfather encourages and cheers on their grandchildren must evolve to meet the grandchildren’s needs. Our cheerleading must also be honest and provide truthful feedback. As the grandchildren grow, they are looking for mentors, like grandfathers, to encourage them and help them improve.

How are you a cheerleader for your grandchildren? How are you showing them that you are 100% on their side? Leave me a comment below and share your experience with being a cheerleader.

Links

Click HERE to enjoy our conversation with Richard Eyre

Click HERE to enjoy our conversation with Frank Sinclair

Peekabond

Readeo

EP – 50 New roles

Our Monthly One on One

“I’m in a place in my life where I get offered parts that I didn’t get offered before – fathers and uncles and grandfathers and so on. And it took me a long time to get to that place, but I’m glad because it opens up new territory.” – Christopher Walken

The episode is a one on one conversation with me and you. In this conversation, I discuss how we are taking on new roles even at our age, and this is a good thing. Men heading into their “grandpa years” should be looking to take on new roles.

Regardless of your age, when taking on a new role, we should all be looking to do the following:

Seek Support

Talk to other experts and those who have held the position longer than you have. Seeking out support is a two-part exercise. We want to get ahold of experts who can tell and show us how this new role should or can function. Two, we need our network to beware of what we are doing and what new roles we are taking on to support us and, most importantly, encourage us as we grow through learning our new role.

Get More Education

Just because we have seen a lot and experienced a lot to this point in our lives does not mean that we should stop learning. When you hit your middle-age years, some would say that learning is something you only do on an “as needed” basis. I say, though, that learning should be part of your everyday life. The Cool Grandpas that I know are always learning. Indeed, education is critical for new roles, like Scout Master, Assistant Baseball Coach, or even the lead shift supervisor at the local food pantry. For example, you may never have had to work with non-paid volunteers. How do you keep non-paid people engaged and showing up every time with their “A game”? I bet there is a book, a podcast, or course on leading volunteers.

Rebrand Yourself

We all have a brand. It is what people think about you, how they have labeled you. To be fair as well, it is what we also think of ourselves. When we take on new roles, we have a great chance to “rebrand” ourselves. If you have not been very outgoing in the past but you volunteer to run intake processing functions of the local food pantry, you will need to stretch yourself to become more outgoing. Taking on a new role is a great chance to educate your family and friends about your new role and help them start to think of you differently. YOU can help them see the shift in yourself and the growth you are undertaking and, as a result, change your brand.

What new roles are you taking on? Where are some areas where you are growing and increasing your knowledge through formal or informal education? How are you changing your brand? Are you directing that brand change, or are circumstances creating a defacto brand?

Please shoot me an email and tell me what roles you are taking on and what changes you are making in your life. You can reach me at greg@cool-grandpa.com

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Adulting 101

EP – 48 Growing Creativity with Grandchildren

Our conversation with Dan Miller

Dan Miller joins us for a fantastic conversation about how to help our grandchildren to think creatively about education, work, and life. Learn about about Dan’s experience and expectations when he learned that he would become a grandfather. Dan was excited and viewed the grandchildren as an extension of the fun and exciting times he and his wife, Joanne, had with their children.

Our discussion then focused on helping his grandchildren learn to hold on to their creativity and passions from childhood to adulthood. We discuss how they use the game CASH FLOW as one of the fun activities that he and Joanne use to help the grandchildren think about how to create wealth.

We also talk about the use of mentors when modeling roles such as being a husband, father, and grandfather. There are many resources available to learn these roles that we take on. Dan and I also talk about how grandfathers or men of the same age group can help reframe experiences that our grandchildren and other youth have. We can help them to think differently about opportunities and find ways to find work that is meaningful, purposeful, AND profitable for them.

Dan talks to us about connecting with the grandchildren on their level and with their interests. By meeting the grandchildren where they are, we help them grow in the way they are ‘bent’ or created and not how their parents or we want them to be. By joining our grandchildren in activities that they enjoy, we as grandparents can learn from our grandchildren.

Be sure to check out the links below for resources that can help you be a Cool Grandpa AND help your grandchildren think creatively about life and work.

Links

48days.com

Dan’s about page

48 Days Eagles Community

The five books that Dan recommends his grandchildren read by the time they are 13 years old:

Acres of Diamonds

How to Win Friends and Influence People

Think and Grow Rich

See You at the Top

The Magic of Thinking Big

Dan’s Books:

48 DAYS TO THE WORK (AND LIFE) YOU LOVE

NO MORE DREADED MONDAYS

RUDDER OF THE DAY – One of my favorites

CLICK HERE to learn about the Game Cashflow that Dan mentioned on the show. This is a game developed by RICH DAD.

Affiliate Links

Readeo

Adulting 101

EP – 44 The Addicted Child

My conversation with Rick Capriola

In this important conversation, we sit down with Richard, “Rick,” Capriola to discuss the important topic of adolescent addition. We dive into what addiction means, including the different substances and how they affect the brain differently. Rick and I also talk about how Grandfathers can play an important role in the identification, treatment, and recovery process of a grandchild suffering from substance dependence.

Rick Capriola spent 11 years working as an addictions counselor for Menninger Clinic in Houston, Texas, before retiring in 2019. Menninger Clinic is one of the top ten psychiatric hospitals in the United States and specializes in assessing, stabilizing, and treating adults and adolescents with substance abuse and psychiatric disorders.

During Rick’s tenure at the Menninger Clinic, he worked in the Adolescent Treatment program and the adult Comprehensive Psychiatric Assessment and Stabilization program. Working closely with psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, and nurses, he was responsible for comprehensive assessments and individual and group counseling with patients diagnosed with substance use disorders.

One of the big takeaways from the conversation is the response to the science of what the different drugs and substances do to the brain that impacted the youth that Rick worked with. It was amazing that the reasons for stopping activities had more to do with the science and the behavior outcomes than just about anything else. What was your big takeaway from this important conversation? Be sure to leave a comment or even a question for Rick in the Comments section below.

Remember to subscribe to The Cool Grandpa Podcast if you haven’t already and share this podcast with a friend.

Links

Click HERE to be directed to Rick’s website.

Click HERE to be taken to Amazon to purchase The Addicted Child: A Parent’s Guide to Adolescent Substance Abuse.

Click HERE to be taken to Rick’s workbook, The Addicted Child: Workbook

Sponsor Links

Readeo

Adulting 101 – be sure to use the code: coolgrandpa at check out to receive 30% off your purchase price.

EP – 24 The importance of growing your relationship with your grandchildren

My conversation with Alexis Wynne

In this conversation, Alexis helps us understand the importance of growing with your grandchildren. We mean by this, and what Alexis helps to explain is that as our grandchildren grow and develop, it is important to recognize them at each development stage. This may seem like a “no duh” idea, but as parents and grandparents, it can be tricky to know when to adjust the relationship and how we interact with our grandchildren.

As much as we want to keep hanging on to those grandbabies, they eventually become teenagers (smelly and full of attitude) and then young adults. The expectations and interactions that we have with them at these life stages will impact our relationship with our grandchildren. Alexis shares how her cool grandpa adjusted the relationship to treat her as a growing young woman and not a little kid.

Alexis also shares the important traditions that her grandfather headed up while she was young and living in California. We learn how camping in the summer and progressive Christmas dinners made for loving and lasting memories.

We also learn that Alexis had a grandfather who was not so close to the family but made an effort to be present at birthdays and occasionally stop by for pie. These little gestures and the acts of showing that he wanted to be involved in his grandchildren’s lives laid a foundation for a growing relationship in their later years.

Alexis is a super go-getter and is a busy young mom with a fun business selling fun jewelry. Please check out the links below if you are looking for some interesting pieces as gifts for a loved one or yourself.

Alexis’ email is popandlockwithalexis@gmail.com

The web is https://paparazziaccessories.com/409101/

https://www.facebook.com/popandlocketwithalexis

EP – 22 Learning about a strong relationship with Adrienne’s Grandfather

My conversation with Adrienne Davis

In this conversation, we are learning about a strong relationship with Adrienne’s grandfather. Adrienne sits down with me to discuss how she came to live with her grandfather starting at the age of one year old.

Adrienne walks us through how her grandfather helped to raise her while her mom was driving a truck on national and regional routes. We learn how important it is that when grandfathers share little things like playing checkers or pulling a youngster in a wagon while cutting the grass. Adrienne shares that those seemingly little activities allow grandchildren to both enjoy the moment but build a connection with their Cool Grandpas.

We also get into how Adrienne’s grandfather protected and guided her through challenging experiences in her middle and high school years including being expelled. Adrienne’s grandfather seemed to know just what was needed at the moment to help Adrienne through trials and troubling circumstances.

Through all the years, Adrienne was able to maintain a bond with her grandfather that resulted in them having a loving relationship through his declining years. Although that bond was not always the strongest in terms of being physically close, the bond was powerful enough that his recall of who she was, stayed with him as connections with others drifted from his mind.

You will be richly rewarded by listening to this loving tribute by a granddaughter for her grandfather.

Grandpa’s, listen to how the little things that Adrienne’s grandfather did help to guide and set a direction with Adrienne so that she can use some of the same activities with her work as Forest Therapy Guide. You can check out what Adrienne is doing as a Forest Therapy Guide by clicking on their Facebook page HERE.

Below is the list that Adrienne share with me on our conversation.